Reservations
by Shin-no-Nekochan
Summary: Saucy comments fly and spice things up as one misunderstanding leads to another over the simple matter of dinner. [Pre Journey, Smoke Signals, Mild Language]


_Reservations_

_A Story for the _Smoke Signals _Thread_

By Nekochan

**Author's Note**

_Believe it or not, Chibi Goku in this one is not __**only**__ channeling my brother, he's also channeling my friend, ASeptemberRose. (Laughs) You probably won't be able to tell the difference, but that's what makes it's so funny to me. I beta her stuff, so you should definitely go read it. (Smile.) This story actually takes place between _**Beast of Burden** _and _**Simple Things**

_For young Goku, I have the songs "_Wherever We Go_" by Newsboys (Go) and "_Trashin' the Camp_" by Phil Collins (Disney's Tarzan) on my playlist. They're both just such bouncy, happy songs that I think it fits very well. For Gojyo, we have "_The Boys Are Back In Town_" by Thin Lizzy (A Knight's Tale), very much a rebellious song, I think. Then there's the tension between Sanzo and Gojyo, packaged very nicely into "_Get Off My Back_" by Bryan Adams (Spirit: Stallion of The Cimarron), since both are starting to get on each other's nerves. Then there's Hakkai trying to placate everyone (still) so for him I have the song "_One World (Not Three) - Love is the Seventh Wave_" by Sting (The Living Sea)._

_Arigatou Minasan! (Thanks everyone!)_

_Nekochan_

(-)(-)(-)

**Mid-afternoon - Keiun Temple, Chang'an, China**

"We're not eating dinner-"

"WHA!?" Goku gasped, stumbling backwards until he fell on the floor. Immediately spinning to sit on his knees, long ponytail trailing his back, he gaped up at Sanzo. "Yer not serious, are ya'?!"

"Settle **down**, _bakazaru_," Sanzo huffed, stuffing his hands in sleeves. "I was trying to say 'We're not eating dinner **here**' and you cut me off!"

Heaving a sigh of relief, Goku stood up. "Sooo . . . We're still eatin' dinner?"

"Yes, idiot, you'll still get fed," the priest retorted. _Tenkai knows he'd probably start eating the temple __**steps**__ if he got hungry enough._

The young brunet looked thoughtful for a moment, then mumbled, "Well . . . uh . . . if we're not eatin' **here** . . . then . . . Where?" He blinked up at Sanzo.

"Hakkai's coming in that Jeep thing of his to take us to some restaurant-"

"_RESUTORAN_!?" The _chibi_ exclaimed happily, jumping into the air and then running to stand at Sanzo's feet. "Really? We're really, **really** going to a _resutoran_-"

"YES!" The blond rolled his eyes, hand coming up to his face. _Goddamnit I wish I had my _harisen _right now,_ he moaned silently. (1) "Yes, monkey, we're going to the **restaurant**, but only if you get cleaned up first."

"Aww, why?"

"JUST DO IT!"

"OKAY, okay, geez!" Goku grumbled before taking off toward his room.

"HEY!" Sanzo shouted after him, "And don't wear your goddamn **jeans** for once!"

"Got it!" Goku replied as he rounded a corner, nearly making a monk carrying clean sheets lose his balance.

"**Kindly** watch where you're going, you-" The monk shouted before looking back to where he was heading and, upon seeing Sanzo, gulped loudly, "Oh! Oh, Sanzo-sama, I didn't know that you were-"

"Save it, just go do whatever the hell it was you were going to do," the priest snarled before heading out to the main steps to wait for Hakkai.

This was the first time that Sanzo was without his treasured _harisen _since he'd brought Goku down from his prison-like cave. For three days now he'd had to restrain himself from hauling off and smacking the _chibi_ upside the head for every little infraction. _It's not like I don't know that kid's rock-solid head couldn't take it, but I'd just probably break my hand before getting to the fifth hit._

Since that was the case, when Hakkai had come for Goku's lessons yesterday, Sanzo had outright **told** Hakkai to bring him his new harisen with all due haste. It was then that Hakkai had suggested the four of them getting together for dinner again. _'Don't worry, Sanzo, I'll take care of the reservations and transportation,'_ the bespectacled brunet had said, _'Please just ensure that Goku is dressed for the occasion.'_

_'Dressed for the occasion' where Goku is concerned basically means ensuring he looks as much like a normal 15-year-old boy as possible,_ Sanzo grumbled to himself as he remembered the first - and last - time he took Goku shopping for pants and shirts. _If Hakkai's up to anything, I swear I'll make HIM take Goku shopping next time._ In spite of Hakkai's agreement to make an outfit for Goku, Sanzo hadn't laid eyes on so much as a pattern design from Hakkai, much like the promised _harisen_.

_That guy . . . _Sanzo sighed, thinking about Hakkai, _he's entirely too subservient for my tastes - like somehow his backbone disappeared the instant I took my gun back from him, always doing __**any**__thing an' __**every**__thing for every__**one**__ . . . I don't care what he says, he doesn't owe me a damn thing, but if this is another one of his attempts to 'serve' me, I swear I'll take my harisen to __**HIS**__ head!_

After the priest had spent another good ten minutes contemplating what Hakkai could be plotting, he heard the telltale footsteps of a young boy running as fast as he could toward the front gate.

"Food, food, gonna' get food! Food, food, gonna' get FOOOOD!" Goku sung, amazing Sanzo that he had any breath at all when he came to a dead stop at his mentor's side. "Aww, Hakkai an' Gojyo aren' here yet? Man . . ."

Sanzo looked down at the boy, noticing he was wearing his pale blue pants and shirt. _Tch, he listened to me for once . . . must have been the prospect of food that did it._

"_Naa_, Sanzo?"

"What?"

"Why can't I call it a _resutoran_?"

"Did I say you couldn't?" Sanzo inquired sourly, fingering a cigarette, debating whether or not to light up in Goku's presence.

"Well, no, but I dunno' what it actually means, just heard Gojyo use it a buncha' times-"

Sanzo crushed the stick and tossed it away. "Just shut up, you're not making sense anymore."

"What kinda' reason is that?" Goku protested indignantly, arms flung straight down at his sides with his fists balled.

_I refuse to participate in this,_ Sanzo decided and didn't answer.

"Sanzo?" Goku prodded, tugging on the length of the priest's robes. "C'mon on, Sanzo, talk ta' me." When it didn't appear as though Sanzo was going to give in, Goku started pouting. He sat down on the ground, whining, "You **never** wanna' talk ta' me . . . just make me sit in th' room waitin' fer Hakkai ta' come an' teach me stuff."

_And this is a bad thing because . . .?_ Sanzo thought to himself.

"It'd be nice ta' talk ta' ya'. I like talkin'," Goku chattered as if reading Sanzo's mind. The boy laughed before continuing. "**Almost** as much as I like eatin'! Guess it's 'cuz that's stuff I couldn' do in that cave. That makes sense, doesn' it? C'mon, tell me it makes sense!"

Heaving a long sigh, Sanzo turned away slightly, looking for any sign of Hakkai. _Idiot __**really**__ doesn't know when to just shut up, does he?_

The little brunet frowned. "Ya' know what, I don' care if it makes sense. I **like** talkin' an' eatin' an' playin' an' . . . munchin' an' runnin' an' jumpin' an' eatin' an' - YAY!"

The sound of a mechanical engine and a loud, happy call of "Kyuu!" alerted Sanzo and Goku to Hakkai's approaching presence. A moment later, Jeep appeared from the forest trail with Hakkai in the driver's seat.

"So sorry for keeping you waiting!" (2) Hakkai greeted happily when Jeep stopped in front of them. "I hope you haven't been out here that long?"

Sanzo looked like he was about to answer, but the _chibi_ cut him off.

"I can sit up front, can' I?" Goku announced, not waiting for an answer before jumping into Jeep's passenger seat.

Hakkai looked over at the priest. "Is that all right with you, Sanzo?"

"Don't expect to make a habit of that," the grumbling blond insisted as he climbed into the back seat. _Maybe he'll stop bothering __**me**__ an' bug Hakkai for awhile._

"Hey, where's Gojyo?" Goku asked as he looked around the vehicle.

Hakkai smiled down at the smaller brunet. "He's holding our reservation at the restaurant."

"Rez-ur-vay-shun?" Goku inquired as he blinked his round, vacant eyes.

"That's right," the older brunet nodded as he shifted Jeep into gear and headed away from the temple, towards downtown Chang'an. "Most nice places to eat appreciate it if you let them know in advance that you're coming."

"An' that's what Gojyo's doin'?"

"Indeed."

"You never did tell me just **where** we're going, Hakkai," Sanzo called bitterly from the back seat.

The driver smiled and gave a small laugh before answering, "Oh my, did I forget to mention that?" He turned to Goku and continued, "It's funny that you should be wearing that outfit Goku. If I'm not mistaken, you wore that the winter when we had _sukiyaki_ for the first time, didn't you?"

Goku blinked again. "Uh . . . I dunno . . . How'd ya' **remember** that, Hakkai??"

Hakkai laughed yet again, which was starting to annoy Sanzo, like he was doing it on purpose to cover up his real feelings. _Almost like he either can't stand breaks in a conversation, or answering questions directly, or both. How hard is it to say the name of a restaurant? Tch._

"I just have a good memory for such things, Goku. In any case, the reason I was amused that you wore that outfit is because, today, we are going to a _Youshoku_ restaurant and, unless I'm mistaken, it will be your first time going to one, am I right? Perhaps for you, too, Sanzo?"

"Don't care much for the stuff," the priest replied.

"Naa, Hakkai?"

"Yes, Goku?"

"Is _Youshoku_ food made **from** _youkai_ or food made **for** _youkai_?" (3)

"_Anou . . ._ That's not quite what _Youshoku_ means, Goku."

"Huh?"

"It's not _Youkai_-food, Goku, it's **Western**-food," Hakkai explained calmly.

The little brunet looked up at Hakkai with starry eyes and some drool coming from his mouth. "_Ne ne_, what kinda' food d'they have there? Tell me, tell me! Chicken? Pork? Fish?"

"I should think they serve all of that," Hakkai mused out loud. After looking around at the passing buildings, he turned left and then said, "We should be there momentarily."

"YAY!" Goku cheered from the front, while Sanzo kept quiet in the back.

_Western food is always so heavy and the silverware makes you eat like a barbarian, _Sanzo thought, _Not like you'd be able to tell the difference with the monkey._

"Ah, here it is," Hakkai announced when Jeep stopped, "The 'Super-K Buffet' . . . 'Market-fresh from the West.' "

Sanzo glared at the sign before stepping out of Jeep. _What a stupidly long name_.

"What's the K stand for?" Goku asked as he hopped out, not even bothering to open the door.

"Perhaps you can ask the manager when we go inside," Hakkai answered, "You two head inside while I let Hakuryu change."

"Kyuu!" The vehicle chirped.

" 'Kay!" Goku exclaimed as he waved, turning towards the restaurant as Hakkai drove towards the nearest alleyway.

"Oi, Goku," Sanzo called halfheartedly, "Where do you think you're going?"

The boy pointed at the curtained entryway underneath of the 'Super-K Buffet' sign. "Inside, where the food is?"

"You plan on walking right in there and demanding food? Moron," the priest complained as he walked past Goku, "Just follow me."

"Wait up, Sanzo!" Goku pleaded loudly as he caught up with Sanzo, "I wanna' eat!"

Ignoring the whining, Sanzo walked up to the uniformed man standing behind a podium.

"Good afternoon, Houshi-sama!" The man greeted cheerfully, "What brings your holiness to our humble establishment?"

"I have a reservation."

"Very well, honored sir, under what name is your reservation?"

It occurred to Sanzo that Hakkai hadn't said what name he'd given for the reservation. However, he'd been scanning the restaurant for Gojyo and it was about that time that he spied the redhead leaning against a booth in the far corner of the large, open room. Apparently, he was talking with the waitress standing next to him.

Then, hands still jammed into his pockets, Gojyo leaned in and titled his head to the side, getting close to her ear and cheek.

"Wazzup up?" Goku inquired, noticing that Sanzo had tensed in his shoulders and was gritting his teeth.

Sanzo narrowed his eyes and, disregarding the greeter's protests, stalked over towards Gojyo. _Why is it that I keep finding reasons to use my goddamn harisen on the __**one day**__ I don't have it?_

Making his way through the numerous tables & chairs lined up in the restaurant, Sanzo finally came up behind Gojyo as he heard the waitress reply, "Oh my, you're quite the charmer, sir!"

Raising his hand high, Sanzo aimed the smack across the back of Gojyo's head so that he wouldn't fall towards the waitress. "You goddamn pervert!"

Gojyo regained his balance and turned on Sanzo, left hand clapped to the back of his stinging head. "OI! That was **uncalled** for!"

"The rest of us weren't even **IN** the restaurant yet and you were about to get us kicked out!"

"Like hell! We were just talkin'!" Gojyo snarled before turning back to the waitress with a smile. "Weren't we, _ojousan_?" (4)

The waitress was blushing bright red and immediately bowed. "I'm terribly sorry for keeping you waiting, your holiness!" She stood back up and clasped her tray to her chest, "Please, please be seated and I will bring you whatever your holiness desires to drink!"

"Bring a couple of bottles of beer," Sanzo replied calmly and sat down in the booth, pushing past the still-furious redhead.

"Please indulge me, oh honored one," Gojyo grumbled as the waitress walked away, "**Whatever** was I doing that incurred your wrath?"

"Polite words for such a foul mouth," the blond remarked as he stuck his arms in his sleeve and looked out the window. "And I already told you why - you're a walking case of sexual-harassment."

The redhead flattened his palms on the table and glared in Sanzo's direction. "That **doesn't** give you th' excuse t' slap me across th' back-a' my **head**, asshole!"

"--ome **oon**, Hakkai! There's **all** tha' food ov'r there an' 'm **starvin'**!"

"We need to order first, Goku, and then you can eat as much as you want."

Hakkai approached the table with Goku at his side, who plopped down in the booth next to Sanzo. "_Naa_, Sanzo, why'd ya' take off?"

"Aside from causing a scene in public," Hakkai noted as Hakuryu made a chirp of agreement from his shoulder.

"Gojyo was the one causing a scene," Sanzo retorted.

"Was **not**!"

Sanzo glared up at Gojyo from his seat. "You were **flirting** with an employee of the restaurant."

"And since when is **that** a crime?"

"Since we made a reservation here to eat."

As Goku had no intention of getting involved in the argument and was convinced no one was paying any attention to him, he decided to slip off towards the food again.

"I was **savin'** your stupid reservation!" Gojyo insisted as he leaned forward again, hands still on the table.

Sanzo turned away. _Another idiotic conversation I've managed to get myself into._

"Ha. You clam up when you start losin' a debate!"

"Now, Gojyo, that's enough," Hakkai admonished.

"He freakin' **slapped** me!"

_Apparently not __**nearly**__ as hard as I should have,_ Sanzo thought.

"It would appear as though I was not fast enough," Hakkai sighed as he sat down, scooting in so he was across from Sanzo, "Replacing Sanzo's _harisen_, I mean."

Gojyo made a "Tch" noise before taking his seat next to Hakkai, pulling his lighter and pack of Hi-Lites out.

"Perhaps it would be nice to have a smoke-free meal for once," Hakkai said through a smile, looking directly at Gojyo.

"Not like the monkey's gonna' be at th' table fer longer'n ten seconds anyway - he's already gone, probably drooling all over the food."

"Goku is not the only nonsmoker."

"Geez, fine, fine," Gojyo grunted as he stretched under the table to put the items back in his pockets. "Woulda' thought you'd be used t' it by now," he mumbled under his breath.

"You do realize that if we are to get anything to eat, we should consider going up to the buffet and getting a plate before-"

"Before the kid eats the place out on his first trip up there, I got it." The redhead sighed as he stood up to get out of the booth, but turned to face his friend. "Actually, Hakkai, would ya' mind stayin' and orderin' drinks for th' **rest** of us since I noticed **tight-ass** over there didn't bother to?"

Hakkai gave a nervous laugh while the mood around Sanzo darkened noticeably. "Yes, Gojyo, I can do that if you can take care of Goku."

"Yeah, what the heck," Gojyo replied, shrugging his shoulders.

As Gojyo turned on his heels to leave, Hakkai added, "Thank you for seeing to Goku in my stead!" (5)

"Kyuuuu!" Hakuryu tried echoing Hakkai's intonation.

"**Thank you, Hakkai**!" Gojyo called back in a faint singsong voice, mimicking Hakuryu.

"See, he really isn't that bad a person when you ask politely, is he, Sanzo?" Hakkai mused, half as commentary, half as an actual question.

"You didn't exactly **ask** him to do anything and I don't care how good or bad you think he is," Sanzo grumbled as he massaged his temples, "He's still the most perverted bastard I've ever had the misfortune of knowing."

"And here I thought you two were friends," Hakkai chuckled, "You certainly share enough character traits."

Sanzo took to glaring at the man sitting across from him. "How in the **world** did you figure we were friends?"

"Well, after something on the order of two years, one would think . . . A 'companion', then?"

"Like hell."

" 'Acquaintance'?"

"More like 'Annoyance'," Sanzo cursed. "If you have to have a name for the _kankei_, call it that." (6)

"My, so that's how it is," Hakkai mused out loud, propping his head up with his right hand so he could look out over the restaurant at Goku and Gojyo.

Sanzo sat up straight, trying to garner any information he could from Hakkai's body language. Finally, he gave up and simply asked, "Why do you even care what I think of Gojyo? Or any of you for that matter?"

"Well, I just think that everyone develops a _kankei_ with everyone else they meet, but it's never the same for each person. I certainly think of you, Gojyo, and Goku in different ways, but I suppose even then there's some similarities . . ." Hakkai paused to tilt his head down, a glazed look coming over his eyes, "I owe Gojyo my life, you my freedom, and Goku my sight."

_Damnit, I knew he still felt like that!_ "We've been through this before - at least where I'm concerned, you owe me **nothing**. I can't speak for the other two."

"Yes, I suppose you did say that once or twice already," Hakkai sighed, absentmindedly petting the dragon curled around his shoulders.

"Kyuuuu . . ." Hakuryu nearly purred.

Sanzo was fairly certain that Hakkai had wanted to say more, but realized the waitress had come back, bringing his beer and a few glasses.

"Excuse me, miss, could we have three glasses of cola?" Hakkai inquired.

"Of course," the waitress nodded. She pulled a pad of paper out of her apron and scratched some notes down. "And what will your honored sirs be having to eat this afternoon?"

"Four for the buffet, miss, thank you."

"Yes, right away, and please help yourselves then," the waitress agreed, bowing and taking off again.

"You're going to give the kid **cola**?" Sanzo said, snorting in derision, "Now I have some apprehension leaving Goku in your care."

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" Hakkai wondered, furrowing his brow in confusion as he reached for one of the beer bottles.

Sanzo watched the brunet pour his glass as he replied, "In a few days, I need you to take Goku for awhile. I don't feel like explaining everything here."

"I see. Well then, I believe I'll go get something to eat now. Will you be getting your own plate, then?" Hakkai asked Sanzo when he'd stood up from the booth.

"Yeah, just-" Sanzo's comment was interrupted by the sound of bickering, "Make those two behave, would you?"

Hakkai gave a small laugh before leaving. "Of course. Now, little one, are you ready to eat?"

"Kyuu!" Hakuryu replied happily, nuzzling Hakkai's cheek.

(-)

Goku felt like his eyes were about to pop out of his skull and that there must be a puddle of drool at his feet, but he didn't care - he'd never seen so much food in his entire life. There were four long carts **full** of piping hot food and his nose was in overdrive trying to distinguish each of the divine smells from one another.

The nearest cart smelled mostly of vegetables with a hint of meat mixed in. The other cart on that side, Goku noted, had the distinct smell of bread and other pastries, as well as something very, very sweet. Goku **decided** to definitely check out that cart later.

What currently captivated his attention, however, were the two carts full of a variety of meats - **those** scents he was intimately familiar with. Chicken, duck, pork, lamb, beef, fish, shrimp, crab, and delectable combinations of those mingled with others he didn't recognize, which fascinated him beyond belief. Then there were the sauces - sukiyaki, teriyaki, soy, duck sauce, sweet & sour sauce, and still more things that he'd never smelled **once** in his lifetime.

Goku was so mesmerized by everything that when Gojyo approached him, he didn't even notice. Realizing this, Gojyo stepped up to Goku's right side and reached around the small boy to tap him on his left shoulder.

Nothing happened. Frowning, Gojyo lightly rapped Goku's head with his knuckles. "Oi, _saru_, anybody in there?"

"Hey! Wha' th' heck wazzat for?" Goku snarled, turning narrowed golden eyes on Gojyo and balling his fists.

"T' get yer attention, what else? You were ogglin' th' food like I -" Gojyo paused, deciding to spare the boy **that** level of embarrassment, for fear of **either** Sanzo or Hakkai learning that he was 'corrupting the mind of a child'.

"Like you . . . what?" Goku asked, cocking his head to the side.

"Like I . . ." _Shit, I can't really think-a' anythin' else t' compare th' kid's love-a' food with!_ "Anyway, ya' wanna' eat, right?"

That was enough to distract Goku. "Yeah!" He shouted, sending his fists into the air and practically dancing in place.

"Well, ya' gotta get a plate first."

"Why?"

Gojyo blinked. " . . . 'Cuz that's how a buffet **works**, _bakazaru_."

"Huh?"

Gojyo restrained the urge to hit Goku and instead planted his palm on his face. "Look," he began slowly, "here's what ya' gotta do . . . Ya' get a plate -" Gojyo walked over to the stack of plates at the end of the nearest cart and grabbed the top plate. "Put **whatever** th' heck ya' wanna' eat on it - **only** enough ta' fill th' plate," he insisted as he stabbed a slice of turkey and put it on his plate. "Then, ya' take th' plate back ta' yer seat . . ." Gojyo held the plate far out in front of him and took two steps toward their booth. "An' when yer **all done** with that plate, ya' can come back up an' get another one."

"Woah . . . So, how many plates d' I get?"

"Put it this way: you can keep gettin' new plates-a' food until yer full."

"WAI!" Goku cheered gleefully, running towards the stack of plates.

"Hush yer mouth an' don't run, shrimp!" Gojyo insisted. _Or Hakkai'll have my hide!_

"But I wanna' eat!" Goku pouted and grabbed a plate.

"That's all well and good, Goku, but if you're not **careful** with the plates, then you won't get to eat anything."

Gojyo heaved a sigh of relief as Hakkai passed by him and continued walking toward Goku.

Goku's lower lip trembled. "Nuh uh - really?"

"Yes, Goku," Hakkai said softly, kneeling by Goku to rest a hand on his shoulder, "So you must be very careful not to drop a plate. You also must not run or you may trip and burn yourself on the hot food - at that rate, you may drop your food on the ground anyway and that would be wasteful. Do you understand?"

The smaller brunet nodded his head violently. "Uh huh! I **swear** I got it!"

"Very well, then," Hakkai chuckled as he stood up. " 'Let's eat', right?"

"_Itadakimaaaasu_!" Goku echoed happily.

"Well, if yer gonna' eat _youshoku_," Gojyo began as he moved a few trays down the cart, "Ya' gotta' try **pizza**__ kiddo." He picked up a piece and put it on his plate to show Goku.

"_Piza_?" Goku repeated, trotting cautiously over to where Gojyo was standing. He looked at Gojyo's plate, sniffed it, and replied, "It smells like spicy meat an' veggies - is it good?"

"Sausage, ham, pepperoni, cheese, tomato paste, and a bread crust - **hell** yeah it's good!"

"Woah, I never heard-a' **those** meats b'fore!"

"Come, come, now, you two," Hakkai insisted, lightly pushing on their backs, "you can discuss how delicious the food is back at the table."

Gojyo decided to load up on the pizza, some lasagna, garlic bread, and a bit of "General Tso's Chicken," or so Hakkai told him the label read. (6) However, labels didn't mean anything to Gojyo; he just wanted the flavour of the spices, the tang of the sauces, and a bit of substance - the meat and potatoes so integral to _youshoku_ - along with it. All of that mingled with some cola made a true Western meal in Gojyo's mind, though he wouldn't mind a few chasers of beer at a tavern later on.

Hakkai was making good on his promise to the greeter that Hakuryu would not touch the food by very gently admonishing the dragon on his shoulder to keep away from the plate of food he was filling. However, Hakkai **was** planning on feeding the food to Hakuryu and so, anytime he came to a kind of finger-food, he would offer a bit of the food for Hakuryu to sniff. It was in such a manner that Hakkai was learning to distinguish Hakuryu's long, high-pitched happy-noises of approval from the shorter, low-pitched growls of dissatisfaction and the repeated chirps of curiosity when the little dragon continued inspecting the food.

Goku went after the meat. He sniffed every dish and, if it smelled even remotely like meat, he took a portion onto his plate. Of course, that meant that he had lumped all manner of meats into a pile on his plate. The one thing Goku knew well enough was that if he took too much of anything, he couldn't try everything - and he very much wanted to try everything. So, carefully balancing the meat and their sauces on his plate, Goku grabbed as much as he could at once and trotted back towards the booth.

Because Goku had spent so much time getting as much as he could on the first plate, running back and forth between the carts in order to do so, by the time he'd got back to the booth both Hakkai and Gojyo had sat back down on the booth's other seat. The two men were alternating between sipping their dark-colored drinks and eating, while Goku noted that Sanzo was merely drinking what appeared to him like pale brown water from a clear glass.

"_Naa_, Sanzo, aren'cha' gonna' get anythin' ta' eat?" Goku asked, standing at the edge of the table without sitting down.

"Perhaps later."

"Now, Sanzo . . ."

"You're not my mother, Hakkai."

"Hah, not good enough, man, he does that t' everyb-- AH!"

"OW!"

Hakkai looked in earnest between Goku's wide-eyed shock, Gojyo's look of frustration as his body was now angled inward, and Sanzo's sheer malice being concentrated solely in Gojyo's direction. "What on earth just happened?"

"The monkey-" Gojyo began.

"Hey!" Goku started speaking over top of Gojyo.

"The pervert-" Sanzo interrupted.

"OI!" Gojyo cut in.

"All right, all right, that will be **enough**," Hakkai insisted, standing up in the booth with one knee on the seat so he could manage it. "Gojyo . . . would you be so kind as to start with your side?"

"Goku slid inta' tha' seat an' knocked my legs inta' Sanzo's--"

"Maybe ya' shouldn'-a' had yer feet on **my** side-a' tha'--" Goku growled.

"If I tried doin' that, my knees would hit tha' table!" Gojyo insisted.

"Not my--"

"**Sanzo**," Hakkai said in a loud huff, "do you have anything to add?"

"His stupid boot-heels gave me a fucking bruise!"

"How tha' hell d'you know that? For all you know your tender flesh could be no more than **scratched**!" Gojyo retorted.

" 'Could be no more than'? Have you finally been taking lessons from Hakkai?" Sanzo chided. "And with those barges for boots you wear, there's no way I could have **not** been bruised!"

"Aww, did the poor pretty-boy priesty get a boo-boo? Want me ta' kiss it an' make it all better?"

Sanzo cocked an eyebrow. "You keep your mouth **far** away from my legs--"

Gojyo furrowed his brow. "Wha' tha' hell-- Dude, it was **sarcasm**! No way would I ever want to kiss you on the **legs**!"

Goku started choking on his food before finally swallowing it with much effort; Hakkai spit out some of his cola into his hand, which he'd only just barely managed to bring up in time; and Sanzo could do nothing but stare, blinking occasionally at Gojyo.

Time caught up with Gojyo and, as he realized what he'd just said, opened his mouth to say something, failed, tried again, and kept failing.

No one else tried saying anything either, mostly because Goku and Hakkai were still trying to recover and Sanzo was looking in the direction of the wall - away from Gojyo.

"I'll . . . be right back," Gojyo finally said, breaking the silence. He got up and headed for the bathrooms.

No sooner had he left than Hakkai coughed rather loudly, "If it's any consolation, Sanzo, I don't think Gojyo intended for any inference to slip into his statement."

"And it's not like he meant it either." Goku scrunched up his face. "That'd be gross if Gojyo really--"

The color of Sanzo's cheeks was deepening and he knew it. "Get up, _bakazaru_, I need to eat too."

After letting Sanzo out, Goku picked at his food for a bit while Hakkai fed Hakuryu. They sat in awkward silence for a minute before Goku's eyes darted to a white thing sticking out of a shiny cube. When he grabbed at it, he was shocked to see another one take its place. When he grabbed that one, yet another appeared. "Uwaa," Goku giggled, thoroughly enjoying his newfound game.

"Goku."

The boy stopped dead in his tracks for fear of getting in trouble, but Hakkai wasn't even looking at him. "Yeah?"

"I'm going to go get another plate of food. Please stay here," Hakkai requested as he stood up, not waiting for an answer.

"Uh . . . okay," Goku answered quietly.

"Kyuu?" Hakuryu chirped at being left behind.

(-)

Gojyo slammed his head against the wall of the bathroom just hard enough to make him notice it without knocking himself unconscious. _Stupid, stupid, stupid . . . Really dug myself a hole with that one. Is that quickie from this morning really got me that messed up today? _He turned around and slid down the wall to sit on the ground. _Maybe Sanzo had the right idea smacking me- What the hell am I saying? It's not my fault if I'm gettin' some an' he's not!_

He crossed his legs and put both hands on his knees. _That's right, I'm an adult, I'm more than allowed t' do whatever th' hell I feel like even if it pisses off Sanzo-houshi-sama! So what if I slip up? __**I**__ know I didn't meant what he thought I meant - woah that's confusing - but that's all that matters. I don't like Sanzo that way - hell I don't like the bastard __**period**__ - an' if he took it that way, that's __**his**__ problem and not mine._

"Yosh!" Gojyo said aloud as he stood up, glad to have come to that decision. However as he left the bathroom, he had to snicker, "Man, dude's gotta' be dumber'n the monkey t' think I'd ever-- HA! With Sanzo, **puh**-leez."

When Gojyo got back to the booth, he was appalled to see that Goku had been left alone and not lost any time in finding a way to amuse himself. He even beamed as Gojyo approached.

"_KAMIYAMA_!" Goku declared happily pointing at his structure. It was a mountain made entirely out of napkins - a foot and a half tall!

"Say what?"

"It's a _kamiyama_!" Goku repeated, "I made it all by myself!"

Suddenly, the top of the mountain began to shake and a white head popped out of the top.

"You buried Hakuryu in that thing??" Gojyo demanded.

"Hakuryu, now you messed it up! Aww man-"

"Kyuu!" The dragon cried, flapping his wings as he tried to get out and making the napkins fly all over the booth.

"Gah!" Goku shouted and ducked under the table.

Gojyo couldn't help but laugh. "You know you're gonna' have t' clean that up, right, shrimp?"

"What?" Goku gasped, trying to sit up straight, "That's not- OW!" He'd bumped his head on the underside of the table.

"Poor, poor monkey," Gojyo chuckled as he knelt down. "Come on, get outta' there." He put a hand on top of Goku's head, steering it until the boy was clear of the table.

"Why d'ya have t' be so mean, Gojyo?" Goku pouted as he scooted back into the booth, also upset that there was no more food on his plate.

"What? How was that mean?" The redhead balked as he sat down on the other side of the table.

"Not that - how ya' got Sanzo all angry."

"Oh."

"When you make him mad, he gets mad at **me**."

"Yeah, well-"

"**AN'** Hakkai gets all funny too, tryin' t' talk t' Sanzo…"

_Damnit, why does Sanzo's mood have ta' affect everyone __**else**_ Gojyo thought angrily. _The kid's right, that's hardly fair at all. Bastard should just keep it ta' 'imself._ "Sorry ya' had ta' put up with that, Goku. How about we go get some dessert, huh? Will that cheer ya' up?"

"WAI!" He beamed. "An' Sanzo too - maybe that'll make him not angry!"

Gojyo nodded. "Fine, Sanzo too."

(-)

"I don't want to hear it, Hakkai."

"But Sanzo-"

"But nothing, Hakkai, that **friend** of yours needs to learn when to keep his big mouth shut. He's been nothing but trouble since I first met him and I'm telling you right now that I don't want to spend-" Sanzo put some noodles on his plate. "Another minute with him unless I absolutely have to. **You're** the only one who needs to teach Goku, so there's no reason for **him** to come along, and next week **you** can come pick the kid up **without** him. It's as simple as that. And if he **ever** comes to see me, I'll sic the **whole** temple on him to run him out as an unclean, perverted heretic of a half-breed."

Hakkai took a ladle of mashed potatoes. "That seems more than excessive for one little comment, don't you think, Sanzo?"

"It **wasn't** just one little comment, Hakkai!" Sanzo barked, moving to the sauces. "He **keeps** making comments - embarrassing me in public! I could care less about the guys that grovel at my feet or flaunt their own positions of power, but, damnitall, I will **not** be made a fool! The monkey's bad enough as it is!"

"Sanzo, he's like that with everyone, even me sometimes."

"Didn't you hear me before? **I. Don't. Care.** He can go fuck the whole staff for all I care - as long as **I'm** not being associated with him!"

Grabbing a new fork to eat with, Hakkai continued to press Sanzo. "You know . . . you embarrass him, too."

"Like hell." Sanzo went for some green beans.

"I'm serious. You smacked him on the head as if you were his father and he was younger than Goku."

"Pervert **deserved** that one."

"And as long as you keep that attitude, he'll keep his. You're more alike than you'd think - you could be good for one another, moderating each other's personalities, if you became friends like he an I."

_No. Fucking. Way._ Sanzo left for their booth, not noticing Gojyo and Goku at the ice cream cart. However, he did see a waiter at their booth and only Hakuryu on the table. "What happened here?" He demanded.

"Just a bunch of scattered napkins, sir. I'm picking them up for you, since they're dirty now," the waiter replied as he moved out of the way for Sanzo and Hakkai to sit.

"Was there a spill of some sort?" Hakkai inquired.

"No, I don't think so, at least not when I got here. The redheaded man just asked me to clean it up, that's all I know." He pointed out Gojyo with Goku.

"I see," Hakkai acknowledged. "Well, thank you for that."

"Not at all, sir," the waiter replied, bowing and excusing himself.

Sighing, Sanzo massaged his temples. "Cola **and** sweets? You do realize the kid's going to be absolutely bouncing off the walls when we get back tonight? Just great," he grumbled.

"If it's not an enormous inconvenience to you, Gojyo and I could stay at the temple for an hour or so and you could let Gojyo play with Goku to wear him out," Hakkai offered helpfully. "Naptime always came after recess when I was a teacher."

"I bet." Sanzo glared over at Gojyo, who had finished scooping for Goku and had moved on to his own bowl. He sighed again. "I suppose I can make him do that. It's the least he can do to make up for his own mistake by giving the kid ice cream. Plus the idiot can take him off my hands a few days early."

Hakkai looked puzzled. "You mentioned something about that earlier. Why on earth do you need us to take Goku? I brought your new _harisen_ with me - I thought that was all you needed?"

"I **do** need it," Sanzo admitted before taking a sip of his beer. _More than I ever thought possible for one day_. "But another matter came up at the temple-" Before Sanzo's eyes appeared a sundae of vanilla ice cream and chocolate sauce topped with whip cream, crushed almonds, and a cherry. "What the hell is that?"

A pair of golden eyes were beaming at his mentor. "Gojyo an' I made it for you! It's a dessert so it's super-sweet an' super-delicious!"

Gojyo scuffed his feet and looked away while holding two ice cream cones, one in each hand. "Uh- Hakkai, this one's for you an' this one's the kid's. Can you hold 'em so I can go get my own?" He held the cones out while pointedly looking away from Sanzo.

"Of course, Gojyo." Once his friend had gone back to the dessert cart, Hakkai continued, "Wasn't that nice of him, Sanzo?"

"Hmph." Sanzo picked up a spoon, began to eat his sundae, and didn't say another word the rest of the meal.

(-)

"HAHA! Can't catch me!"

"Oh, I **will**, shrimp! You just **watch** me!"

Hakkai smiled as he watched Gojyo and Goku on their fourth loop around the temple. Sanzo was sitting a short distance away, smoking and inspecting his _harisen_. "Well," he asked, "is it to your liking?"

The new _harisen_ lacked the black tape holding it together that the old one had, so Sanzo was still trying to figure out how it was held together at the base, though he wouldn't admit it out loud.

"I used a thicker paper, but that proved harder to keep folded, so I folded off a handle and just put some glue between the folds down there."

_I really hate that he can do that,_ Sanzo grumbled to himself.

"I wonder if you managed to find an extra layman's scarf what with being so busy . . ." (7)

_Damnit, I completely forgot. He probably won't forget about it, either. I hate that even more about him - his memory capacity._

"But I'm sure Gojyo and Goku would be able to keep themselves occupied for another hour or so."

_His subtle commands are the worst, though._ "I'll tell someone to get it for me."

Hakkai smiled brightly at the monk. "Thank you very much, Sanzo."

Sanzo decided to take out his frustrations - all three of his 'companions' had managed to aggravate him in a single day - on every monk to cross his path by sending them on a frantic search for a layman's scarf. Simultaneously, three appeared with the silken items in their hands. Grabbing the one closest to him, he stormed back out of the candlelit hallways of the temple.

The stars were coming out in the dusk, but Sanzo had no trouble seeing the wrestling match between Gojyo and Goku with Hakkai looking on from the steps. The blond merely shook his head and glared downward as he stepped up beside Hakkai.

Raising his eyes ever so slightly to catch Hakkai in his peripheral vision, Sanzo began, "Oi, here's the-"

"RYARGH!"

"OW! YOU DAMN CHIMP!"

Sanzo was about to reprimand both of them for making so much noise, but stopped short. Gojyo had his arm around Goku's throat and the boy had apparently clamped down on the offending limb in an attempt to get free. The fuming redhead was grabbing at brunet hair, a glint of gold catching Sanzo's eye.

In the blink of an eye, the monk had his _harisen_ raised and passed by Hakkai, crossing the distance to the wrestling match. "CUT IT OUT, MORONS!" With a resounding **THWACK,** the fan came down on Gojyo's head.

Stunned by Sanzo's interference, Gojyo released Goku, who simultaneously released Gojyo.

"Ya' damned priest, th' hell wazzat for?" Gojyo moaned while rubbing his head.

"I was even winnin'!" Goku pouted.

"Were not, you were **cheatin'**!" Gojyo hissed.

"Tch." Sanzo crossed his arms, _harisen_ still prominently displayed as if threatening the two to start up again.

"Sanzo, they were only playing tag-" Hakkai tried to say as he approached.

"THAT wasn't tag!" The priest pointed his fan at Goku's head. "THAT was playing too rough!" He indicated Gojyo.

"Sanzo, it's okay, really, 'm okay! Honest!" Goku piped up.

"Trust me when I say that **this** idiot wasn't being cautious enough so you **could** have been hurt, Goku," Sanzo insisted.

All three just stared at the priest for a minute, who just continued to scowl like that was enough of to make his point.

"Look," Sanzo decided, "Hakkai, take your damn scarf -" _which must've been locked in a closet for __**years**__ because it's pink now_ - "and your troublemaker, and just go home for the evening."

Gojyo was glaring daggers at Sanzo's back. "Why you arrogant sonofa-"

"I'll see you in a few days, Hakkai. Goku, it's time for bed."

"Uh . . . 'kay," the boy replied sullenly as he trotted up the temple steps. He turned around and waved. "Night, Hakkai! Night, Gojyo!"

On the way back to their place, Hakkai tried to placate Gojyo. "It truly does amaze me what anger does to people."

"Doesn't amaze me one bit," Gojyo replied. "I'm not new to name-calling."

"True, but not this kind, am I right? Insults from people who don't know you are easier to brush off, I think, especially when they're about things you can't change."

"Meh."

"All you have to do is prove Sanzo wrong, Gojyo," Hakkai insisted.

The redhead snickered. "And why would I care about what Sanzo thinks of me?"

"Why don't you tell me?"

Hakkai knew something Gojyo didn't, and Gojyo knew that, but he was entirely too angry at Sanzo at the moment to figure out what that was . . . or how Hakkai had come to figure it out . . . or what Hakkai was plotting now that he had it figured it out. "Tell you what, Hakkai," Gojyo decided, "If an' when I **do** care what the bastard thinks, I'll tell ya' why."

The man at the wheel smiled toward the road. "It's a deal."

(-)(-)(-)

_**-owari-**_

_8/14-9/9/2007_

_(1) In "Beast of Burden", Sanzo's _harisen _became bent and Hakkai offered to make another one for him. _

_(2) "_Omatase itashimashita_" is the super-polite Japanese that Akira Ishida as Hakkai would be using here._

_(3) Here, Goku thinks that _Youshoku _is a contraction of "_Youkai no shoku_", which could mean either of the phrases Goku thinks it does._

_(4) Normally, Gojyo refers to girls as 'cutie' (_kawaiiko-chan_) or 'girlie' (_[oneechan_). In contrast, Gojyo is being a little politer by referring to the waitress as '_ojousan_' (miss). _

_(5) "_Goku o yoroshiku_" is the polite Japanese that Akira Ishida as Hakkai would be using here._

_(6) _Kankei _literally translates to 'relationship' in English without any romantic connotation, as in 'the __**relationship**__ between politics and law'. It is thus one of the most unemotional words for 'how two people know each other' in Japanese, favorably or unfavorably; the 'connection' between two nouns (people, places, or things). As the word has no good English equivalent, I chose to use the Japanese word._

_(6) In case you didn't catch the subtext, yes, I just implied that Gojyo is functionally illiterate. I will be expanding on this point in fiction in the future._

_(7) At the end of Beast of Burden, when Hakkai offered to make Sanzo's new _harisen, _he agreed to do so in exchange for a layman's scarf, a symbol of a practicing Buddhist that is not a monk (i.e. does not affiliate himself with a temple or a monastic order)._

_It occurred to me that Asian food places often have an amalgam of Chinese, Japanese, and Korean music playing the background. So, what sort of music would a Western food place have playing in China? "_A Dublin Pub_" by Lifescapes (Ireland) is what I decided on. (Laughs) Seriously, though, a better atmosphere song is probably "_And the Earth Spins_" by Paul Winter (Earth: Voices of a Planet)._

_Believe it or not, this ending came about from two things; one was a tie-in to how _**Simple Things** _starts off, but the other is entirely a surprise to me. The characters once again just kind of ran off with my plot. And the pact between Hakkai and Gojyo? Oh that is __**definitely**__ going to come back. (Grins like a madwoman.)_

_Nekochan_

**Japanese Definitions**

Bakazaru - Literally "stupid monkey"

Resutoran - The Japanese pronunciation of the English "restaurant"

Harisen - paper fan

Naa - "Hey . . ." or 'So' / 'Say' in a similar context; attention-getting word

Chibi - little [kid / person

Youshoku - Western-style-food

Ne ne - an attention-grabbing phrase like "Hey" or "Yo yo"

Saru - monkey; a constant nickname for Goku

Itadakimasu - ritual phrase, the equivalent of saying 'grace' or 'let's eat / time to eat'; literally "[I / We will (humbly) eat / drink / partake"

Ne - a particle meaning that the speaker expects agreement; literally 'right?' or 'isn't that so?'

Piza - Japanese pronunciation of 'pizza' pronounced "pee-zah"

Kamiyama - literally 'paper-mountain'


End file.
